Dino Sharks, Mecha Dragons, and Bear/Squids (oh my!)

So I was requested by one of my Libster Nominees Blogsbysidra to answer my own questions as well as the questions she asked to her nominees.

Questions ho!

My Questions:

1. Now first the obligatory time travel question. If you had a time machine where/when would you go and why?

All the best concerts ever recorded in history. I’m talking Mozart, Beethoven, Queen, Beatles, Madonna, all those amazing artists in their prime.

2. How long would you be able to stay awake for? Minutes? Hours? Days? Weeks?

At most three days, but if I was paid a lot of money I could destroy my sleeping cycle for a million dollars. I could destroy plenty of other things for a million dollars but that’s another story.

3. Make up an animal hybrid that describes who you are as a person. (Examples include Dragon/Scorpion, Butterfly/Tiger, and Chicken/Dolphin). Why would you be this hybrid?

Bear/Squid. Bear because I’m cuddly and lazy (and occasionally scary when someone tries to wake me up too early). Squid because no one can comprehend my existence. Also I’m kind of floating around in my own frame of mind, listlessly spiralling deeper into the cavernous waters of my own subconsciousness.

4. What’s in your closet?

*eyes dart away* N-n-nothing… why do you want to know? There’s just uh… what do normal people have in closets? … Shoes! That’s right lots of shoes and, um, clothes… yeah that’s it just clothes… they smell kind of weird if you’re wondering about the smell. I rubbed cabbages all over them, and drizzled some ketchup in the pockets. That’s what the smell is… ketchup and cabbage… nothing else… nothing at all.

…

Hey so how ’bout them Blue Jays?

5. What is the meaning of life in four words?

Do whatever you want (with it).

6. Finish the line “If I could invent anything, I’d invent…”

A mecha dragon.

No explanation needed.

7. Sword fighting or Car chases?

Sword Fighting my good sir, now how about a fair jested duel? On guard I say! On guard! *waves it around* *slips out of hand* *gets wedged in a tree* Ah! You have beaten me! This is an outrage! Inconceivable! Blasphemy! You didn’t even unsheathe your sword! You neanderthalic ruffian! *bites thumb at thee*

8. Write down something you hope you’ll be quoted for in the future.

“You know what your problem is? You’re looking for order where you’ve created chaos.”

9. What is your favourite sassy comeback?

Oh I’m sorry could you speak into the microphone so everyone can hear your rambling bullshit?

10. Okay last two are going to be serious; why did you start your blog?

Eh, I think I answered this already but I’ll humour myself. I started my blog to connect with other writers since I live in a really small town and there’s no more writing clubs. So yeah, I broadened my horizons and went online.

11. Who is your favourite fictional character? Why? (You only pick one)

Really? Really… just one?

I have so much love for so many characters how can you make me pick ONE?! Screw it, I’m going with Jack from Nightmare Before Christmas. Where to start with this guy… basically he’s the Pumpkin King (AND DON’T YOU FORGET IT) but he’s not a snob about his title. He’s in charge of bringing Halloween to the world and he’s good at scaring people but he feels like he’s stuck in a rut. He does the same thing every year and he wants a change. Luckily he finds rejuvenation in the awesome holiday that is Christmas. After that he becomes obsessed with it and soon his obsession kind of takes over his common sense (like most fangirls). After that it gets crazy but for those who haven’t seen the movie I won’t spoil it.

I love Jack because he is in charge of his own choices, whenever he comes to a decision it’s because of his own train of thought (which is wild, wacky, poetic, and bizarre). I also love the elegant way he moves, it’s very fluid and whimsical in a way but make no mistake Jack is a huge drama queen. He will go on about how awesome he is under the pale moonlight to himself and LIGHT HIMSELF ON FIRE AND JUMP INTO A FOUNTAIN for kicks. Yet there’s a sort of sincere, childlike wonder about him that’s very endearing. He’s always passionate and deeply submerged in his own head, and he’s very dedicated to making his own goals a reality. He’s pretty fascinating and fun to watch, that’s why he’s got such a cult following.

Her questions:

1. What inspired you to be a writer/photographer?

Writing class, yup pretty simple. I had an amazing writing teacher who really supported my work and helped me gain confidence in myself. I know it doesn’t come across on paper but in reality I’m quite aloof (because I’m usually in another dimension inside my head) but writing has helped me open up my thoughts and given me something to do with all those insane ideas bubbling in my brain.

2. Writing/Photography are means of communication, how well do you think you communicate?

Uh, are we talking in reality or on paper because those are two very different things for me. Reality: I’m quiet on the outside. I’m like one of those Tootsie pops, you ever had one of those? The lollipop that’s hard on the outside but has an ooey gooey center? Yeah the oogey gooey stuff is on paper, while the lollipop exterior holds in the deliciousness from the rest of the world. However I’ve gotten better at putting myself out there. I read the morning announcements at school, I’ve read some slam poetry at one of those art shows, and now I’ve been cast in a short play at school. So I’m getting there, and maybe one day I’ll finally feel my feet on the ground.

3. Where do you see yourself in future?

On a hammock in Scotland. Possibly one of those hammocks that comes with a servant who can fan me and braid flowers in my hair. I’ll name him Bob, along with my other servants who do things for me. I can’t be bothered to remember all their names; do I look like an elephant to you? (Don’t answer that).

Okay but in all seriousness I’m probably going to travel the world at some point so all of the countries can collectively kick me out. So, I’m hoping to have some wild adventures around the world at some point, you know before I marry a billionaire philanthropist playboy, or maybe that hot guy from that Taylor Swift music video? Either’s fine with me. Then once I’m settled down I’ll buy a castle in Transylvania and charge people to visit on Halloween.

It’s the home that keeps on giving.

4. What else do you prefer doing in your free time?

Well I’ve already answered this one but I’ll add more to the list. On top of writing, gaming, reading, watching anime and playing piano I also like to dance. Not choreographed just freestyle, because if love is oxygen, music is my defibrillator. Oh and don’t even get me started on dance parties. Yeah on the outside I’m quiet but when I get in my groove, people stop and stare like they’ve just witnessed the miracle of birth. On the outside I’m just your average ordinary high school introvert, but secretly… I’m the Dancing Queen. *turns on ABBA*

5. Describe your personality in five lines or less.

Explosion of silence.

Mind of a rabbit hole.

Open eyed misfit dancing in the rain.

Square peg in a round hole.

I’m a sponge.

6. Which Writer/photographer do you look up to?

Chuck Wendig.

He’s not the cleanest brush in the paint bucket but he’s one of the reasons I started this blog. I’ve always found some writers to be too forgettable when they give advice about writing but trust me when I say YOU WILL NOT FORGET WHAT THIS GUY SAYS. I only recommend checking his blog if you’re okay with swearing, because he doesn’t hold back.

7. If you could give one advice to your followers, what would it be?

SAVE ALL YOUR WRITING! Even the stupid schlock of nonsense you wrote in 7^th grade, keep it in a box, lock it with a key, and put it somewhere safe. Why? Because when you’re a famous writer you can bug people about all the boring nonsensical schlock you wrote in grade 7.

No I kid, the reason is because you never know when it might come in handy. Also because it’s good to know how far you’ve come as a writer when you compare it to your older stuff. You can see where you’ve improved and it really helps your ego when everyone is chopping up your words up like salami. Nobody likes word salami, especially writers. Unless you sprinkle it on pizza, then it’s alphabet pizza and who doesn’t want to try that?

8. Writing and photography is an art. What do you think is the essence of this art?

Writing is about shoving people’s faces into your head. This is why perspective is important, because as a writer you need to be aware of how other people will interpret your work and what kind of message you’re sending out there. This is why writing can affect us so much, it’s because we took a crazy psychic trip into someone else’s mind and have come back with a new way to see the world.

You could go your whole life not caring about what birds are chirping about, but once you read Hunger Games you’re going to try and see if they copy that three note whistle you’ve been practicing in your room. That’s just a tiny example, but you get the idea. Writing helps us apply a new perspective on our day to day lives to widen our understanding of the world so we don’t all end up living in a bubble.

9. If you could change the world through your work, what two changes would you bring? How do you think you can accomplish that?

Ha, change the world with writing? Do I look like Shakespeare to you? (Don’t answer that). Well in this hypothetical alternate universe, I would say I’d change how people value human worth and how people view friendship.

I’ll address the first one; sometimes I come across people who can only see the negatives in other. This is more common in high school but sometimes I feel like all we’re doing is pointing out the flaws of others and not seeing the good in people. This kind of elitist attitude can be harmful because it distances you from empathizing and understanding people. All the while I’m pretty sure everyone else is talking smack about you which distances you even more. The world expects us all to be “perfect” but we’re not and we never will be, but because of these impossible standards we alienate ourselves and become lost in our own petty hatred.

The second is friendship, friendship is awesome. I know romance is great and all but friendship doesn’t get enough credit. It’s one of the strongest bonds a person can have without expecting anything in return for their kindness. Why don’t we celebrate it more? It’s a beautiful relationship, literally no strings attached just respect and loyalty to each other.

So to accomplish this I’d write a story about someone who is constantly seen in a negative light for who they are. Then soon they’d start purposefully turning into the bully everyone sees them as because of the rampant negativity in their environment. Then… out of nowhere… someone sees that they’re not the ruthless bully they’ve heard about and tries to befriend them. That’s my one-shot synopsis but it doesn’t sound too bad. Of course I’d have to figure out the details but I feel like it could work… needs more dragons though.

10. Any specific favourite colour? If yes, how do you feel you connect to it?

Purple, the colour of grapes. Grapes are amazing, and purple is a rad colour. I wear purple pretty much every day, and I have lots of purple accessories. I’m kind of obsessed, because it’s just has an air of mystique and depth that other colours don’t seem to have. Purple is like the classy sassy chick in the crayon box, and I love her like a sister.

11. Take five minutes, sit alone, quite, no sounds no noises. Look into yourself. what do you see or feel? how would you bring that up in your work?

Uh… okay but I can’t guarantee anything super deep is going to come out of this. We are talking about my brain right? Okay then, here we go

*sets timer*

*five minutes later*

Okay… I’m never doing that again. Well let’s just say I went on a crazy adventure. First I closed my eyes and I saw a huge neon arrow, so I followed it and I ended up in Las Vegas so… what happens in Vegas STAYS in Vegas. Anyway after I fell off the karaoke stage I woke up in the hospital.

The doctor was like “we need you” and I was like “why?” and he said “we have a space program to see how hard people can party in zero gravity. After the show you put on in Vegas we’re inviting you to take part in this experiment with five other people.” I didn’t bother asking any questions because he had a lab coat on so I said sure.

I was immediately flung into space from my hospital bed and crashed into the party rocket ship. They were playing some funky beats and everyone was partying but I was like “guys, turn on the zero gravity” and they were like “oh sorry we forgot” so we partied in zero gravity. It’s not as easy as it looks.

Sadly I bumped into a button that plummeted us into the sun. I got into the only escape pod and took the last bag of pretzels with me. I’m not entirely proud of myself for that, but it had to be done. Sacrifices had to be made, but I didn’t want a perfectly good bag of pretzels to burn up in the sun.

So I floated around in space for a while and then some aliens came over. They were like “who are you?” and I was like “oh nobody, I just forgot to fill the escape pod with enough rocket fuel to get me home so now I’m kind of stuck here” and they were like “oh no problem, we can give you a lift” so I came back home in an alien space ship.

After my discovery of aliens I was recruited to try and find the “Giant Dinosaur Shark” since I was suddenly known for my proficiency in finding new biological creatures. I was taken to a submarine ship and I was told to speak to our home base from those headset microphone thingys.

So I turned it on and it turned out that I accidentally set it to those party astronauts that crashed into the sun. Apparently they didn’t crash into the sun and I over reacted. They yelled at me for taking the bag of pretzels so I turned off the headset and my five minute alarm went off.

That was my five minute delve into my brain.

…

Why was I so obsessed with pretzels? Do I love them that much? Do I crave pretzels? Well now I do since I abandoned five party astronauts to burn up in the sun for the last batch of them. They were pissed, but it’s not like I took all the snacks, I left them some Doritos.

Honestly I think I restrained myself in that type of crisis. I mean if you were in a party rocket ship that was crashing into the sun what would you do? Exactly! Grab what you can and run, although if it wasn’t for those aliens I wouldn’t  find a career in searching for the Giant Dino Shark.

It’s half dinosaur, half shark, it’s never been recorded on film but the Captain swore he saw it. He never got to the story because of the party astronauts but I’m sure it was pretty exciting and involved why he had a peg leg, a hook for a hand, and a cork screw for an ear. That’s why I was on the headset, because cork screw ears get caught in today’s modern technology.

Anyway what was I talking about? OH how I would bring this into my work? Well obviously now I have to write about searching for a Giant Dino Shark, the other stories were riddled with clichés but this one… this one I can see going places.